The Twenties. Respect.

Respect. Growing up we're always taught to respect our parents, teachers and elders. Once you start dating we're then told to find someone that will respect us. Respect, respect, respect. I've heard this word my entire life. I'm now 25 years old, I still hear this word all the time and I still have no idea exactly what this word means. As always I turn to my team of experts, my friends, and I ask them to explain what respect means to them. You know that saying "are we on the same page", well they were in the same book but definitely not on the same page. So how can we demand respect and show respect to others when no one seems to have a clear cut definition.
When we were younger showing respect to our parents and teachers was easy. You smiled, said your please and thank you's and never raised your voice. The word respect suddenly changes around your teenage years and takes on a whole new meaning. How do you show respect in a relationship? How do you earn respect in a relationship? As you get older respect is more associated with one's actions. You can no longer sit there, look pretty, flash a smile and think your showing someone respect. Unfortunately I, as always, learned this the hard way.
I was having a discussion with my boyfriend that some how turned into an argument. Just when we was running out of names to call each other he turned to me and said, "you just don't respect me." I was floored. Not only that I was pissed. Every single teacher I ever had from Kindergarten to Eighth grade always wrote two things on my report card after the end of every term; pleasant and respectful. So how could I not respect him?
It's hard to point out signs of respect but we all know the signs of disrespect. If your partner belittles you, lies to you and invades your privacy that's disrespectful. Period. You have to find a way to respect one another in order to have a successful relationship, even if your not sure what respect really means. Sit with your partner and talk about it. I am still learning this but I never forget communication goes along way. If you still find that you are being disrespected please don't think by dealing with their disrespect it just proves how much you love them. That is just stupid. You don't earn respect by tolerating disrespect.